we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
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