was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
