I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
Randomize
