i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
Randomize