They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize
