so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
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