I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
Randomize
