If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
Randomize
