What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
I have never pre-planed for a better sober morning than lacing my muffin batch with tylenol.
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Randomize
