Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
Buhtt sex?
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
Randomize
