so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
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