She is in my trunk
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
Randomize
