question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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