Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
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