I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Randomize
