whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
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