I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
Your cat ate my taco.
. . . I don't have a cat?
It was laying in your bed. Now it's hunting for more tacos.
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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