i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
My mom asked what the mark on my neck was - I told her I burned it with a straightener.
She believed that the monsterous hickey on your neck was a burn?
well, not really. but then i reminded her that my sister has yet to take that pregnancy test and she conviniently forgot about my hickey
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
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