don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
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