What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
Randomize
