five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
Randomize
