Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
Randomize
