I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
Randomize
