why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
we're making bets on your personal life
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
Randomize
