at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
