exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
Randomize
