Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
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