I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
Randomize