So we walked by this chick's house and she starts yelling at her boyfriend "STOP HITTING ME WITH YOUR DICK"
operation have a gay friend backfired
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
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