I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
Randomize
