so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
Segways are the fanny packs of transportation. Useful in some situations, but you always look like a tool when using one.
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
Randomize