he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
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