Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
Randomize
