hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
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