There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
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