I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
The power of my boobs compel you
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Randomize
