3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
Randomize
