Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
Randomize
