Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
Randomize
