What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
where are my pants?
in the oven.
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