my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Randomize
