You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
