You made me cry and you don't even care
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
Randomize