Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
