I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
Randomize