is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize