i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
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