i think my mom watched the whole time
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
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