Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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