I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
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